"Crazy Yisrayl Hawkins Day"

Yes, it's June 12 - and if it isn't where you are, it soon will be.

Nuclear Armageddon launches today - in the fevered mind of Yisrayl Hawkins.

Then tomorrow is Friday the thirteenth!

It seems there has been a surfeit of nutburgers sizzling on the barbie lately. This in a tradition which once advertised itself as "a crusade for sanity" (the title of a TW article circa 1972).

Pam Dewey reports in her book that Dizzy Yissy originally gloried in the name "Buffalo Bill Hawkins." His brother Jacob founded a "House of Yahweh" in some god-forsaken corner of Texas back in 1975. Later Bill would claim he and Jake were - surprise, surprise - the Two Witnesses, despite his brother rejecting the idea. Later Yissy would claim October 2000 as the date of Christ's return, with 80% of planet Earth's population wiped out by mid-2001. I wonder if he passed that on to Shimon Perez when he had his photo opportunity with him in November 1998? (see picture)

Today he had another shot at it. Darn, missed again!
I want to reassure the two or three readers who don't share a WCG background that Hawkins and Weinland don't represent the WCG mainstream of times past. Nor, of course, do James Tabor or Lester Grabbe. The truth was somewhere in the confused middle. Frankly, "Buffalo Bulldust" is an embarrassment. Joe Tkach must be thanking his lucky stars that nobody much remembers Hawkins' ties with WCG.

I'm not sure what could top the Weinland-Hawkins Apocalyptic Double Feature... where do you go once you've played the End of the Age card to a chorus of well-deserved raspberries?

Yisrayl knows the answer to that one: you hunch your shoulders and bluster on. It worked in 2000!

Jim West's take on the day (from which I flinched the title of this post) can be found here.

Smitten with an angry Rod?

The following email was in the in-box today. It has been slightly edited:

Rod Meredith visited the churches in southern California this past weekend. His Sabbath sermon at La Crescenta (Los Angeles) was, from what I hear, very harsh. He is very concerned that all 3 churches (L.A., Orange County, San Diego) are falling apart. He gave 5 keys as to why LCG is the true Philadelphian church. He mentioned that a man he used to teach in Bible class is now claiming to be a prophet. This was thought to be a reference to Weinland. He then yelled that anyone to talks badly about LCG or causes trouble in any way by saying anything bad about the ministry will be removed. He was VERY strong. He said that NO ONE is to attend any of the splinters. The threat of disfellowshipment was clearly implied.

I left LCG last summer. Rod is right; the churches in southern Cal are falling apart. One big reason in Los Angeles is, in my view, Jim Meredith, Rod's son. He was ordained an elder in the spring of 2006, but his qualifications for the job aren't obvious... Many people left LCG the very day of Jim's ordination, and others left when Jim said things like "If you're not totally with us, you should leave." Another problem in L.A., in my view, is Jeff Fall, the former pastor. His position is that God is sifting out people and Jeff sees it as his job to force that sifting. He seems to deliberately offend people to test their loyalty. Many said hogwash to that and left. The remaining are loyal and blind and non-thinking. The third problem is what is going on at LCG HQ, which has been well-documented on AW. This is pretty much the sole reason for the destruction of the San Diego church from over 50 to under 20.

Anyway, the entire church has become much more cultish on hierarchical government... It is almost to the point that only the dumb sheep are left.

Uh oh. Not the picture of contentedness you'd glean from reading Bob Thiel's blog is it?

Dumping Weinland: the first step

Weinland is busy pretending he never said what he said: an act of unmitigated cowardice IMHO. But the real question is, why does anyone now continue to follow the guy?

Imagine attending the COG-PKG services last Sabbath knowing all the over-the-top predictions Weinland has made, none of which has a snowball's chance in hell of coming true. Imagine passively sitting there while the clown - strutting and preening - goes through a "business as usual" routine. Imagine then turning around and signing yet another tithe check over to this insanely wrong ministry?

Someone in the comments section pleads: In my opinion, I think Ron and his wife, Laura, are sincere. I believe they are genuinely deceived. I'll spare you all of the details, but I have known both of them for many years and they are good people who think they are doing what God wants them to do.

Rubbish!

Genuinely deceived in proclaiming themselves as the Two Witnesses? Genuinely deceived into cursing those who stand up to their pretensions with cancer? Genuinely deceived into setting dates then acting as though they have amnesia? Genuinely deceived into claiming that God shares special revelations with Ron... How does that happen?

I think we'll have to redefine "good people."

To their credit, a number of members have apparently walked out of the Weinland cult in the wake of his self-evident failure to live up to his own lunatic predictions. But why is anybody still hanging around?

I usually haven't got much sympathy for the "blame the victims" brigade. After all, many decent folk were recruited into the WCG (or a splinter) because they were:

(a) young
(b) naive
(c) inexperienced
(d) idealistic
(e) uneducated
(f) going through a life crisis where easy, instant answers were appealing
(g) a combination of two or more of the above

But surely even the densest, most unsophisticated, wet-behind-the-ears individual would have enough gumption - assuming they can tie their own shoelaces - to see that Ronald Weinland now has zero credibility, and that they've been made to look fools as well.

Understandably, it takes some time for people to detach themselves from failed causes. After swallowing the bait, working your way off the hook may take a while. But to any such folk, it's worth remembering that every great journey begins with a single step.

Step 1: cut off the Weinland tithes! Ron has clearly proven that he's incompetent as a prophet, minister or balanced human being. To continue sending him money is irresponsible in the extreme.

Step 2 will become clear once you action step 1!

Rodney Lain, one of the more interesting characters in the early years of WCG dissolution, had a nice slogan:
Free your mind... and your behind will soon follow.

I can't think of any better advice.

Dear Ron

The Day of Pentecost has fully come - at least here in New Zealand where its getting toward 10AM already. This is your day too! If nothing happens you're going to quit preaching. That's what you've said repeatedly.

Then later you've promised to publicly state that you were wrong about your predictions and become the first false prophet in history to confess to that fact.

What you don't say is whether you'll still stay on your own payroll. Funny that!

Ron, let me confess something too: I don't believe you. I think you'll find a way to weasel out. Perhaps a couple of the sycophants will beg you to stay, and, after due soul-searching you'll selflessly agree.

And I'm also of the opinion that, in the unlikely event that you did depart (clutching a golden handshake?) you'd be back again quicker than Garner Ted from his hunting cabin in 1973.

On the other hand, I want you to know that I don't really consider you so much false prophet as a doofus. Real false prophets are either much more effective or a darn sight more subtle.

Have a nice day. Should be an interesting sermon opportunity! Will look forward to the resignation.

Bride of Packenstein

The news is out... David C. Pack, Grand High Poobah of the Restored Church of God, has remarried, less than a year after the death of his first wife, Shirley.

"J" from the Shadows blog observes: All I can say is, that was extremely quick, wasn't it?
Already observers are wondering whether the lucky lady will recapitulate the Ramona Martin epic. If you're old enough you may even remember the PT article octogenarian Herb wrote - salivation in print - celebrating the successful consummation of his marriage vows on the morning after. Ramona's views were unpublished.

The Worldwide News ran a photograph of the happy couple with officiating minister Garner Ted Armstrong - who relented at the last moment despite being opposed to the union. It was probably one of the last father and son shots before Stan pulled the rug out from under Ted.

Ramona of the painted toenails (makeup doctrine? what makeup doctrine?) proceeded, of course, to take Herb to the cleaners. Truly a mother in Israel!

Dave himself confirms the nuptials in an aside in his latest sermon (along with claiming no know more about prophecy than anyone else in history, and suggesting Weinland is demon-influenced!)

Meantime I know all AW readers will join me in sincerely wishing Big Dave all the wedded bliss that his hero Herb enjoyed with Mrs. Martin.

Update: The identity of the new First Lady is revealed in the comments section, and some interesting questions are asked.

Another Tribulation Farce nut-case

Weinland and Hawkins: both spiritual sons of Herb... these guys deserve each other. Can't you just imagine them giving split-sermons in Petra? Baptist blogger Dr. Jim West has a few words to say on the latter today.

Hawkins says June 12? That's Thursday. Ronaldo says (probably) Pentecost? That's Sunday. Could be a tough week...

The Surprising Ted Johnston

Having just listed The Surprising God blog among the top five I'd prefer to avoid, I was sent back there today to check out the following remarkable statement by Ted Johnston.

...the idea of universal reconciliation, which is a key aspect of WCG's Christ-centered, Trinitarian Theology.

OK, I'm surprised.

It's not that the chief honchos in the Tkach group - Mike Feazell take a bow - haven't dropped enough hints, but when did universal reconciliation become more than a favored speculation?

And while we're at it, what is WCG's position now on the form of Universal Reconciliation preached by the late Ernest Martin back in the 1970s? You can check out Ernie's views on this subject here.

Universal Reconciliation is a teaching that goes a very long way back in Christian history, at least as far as Origen. Eventually (and I'm paraphrasing here) all sentient life - human and angelic - will be received back into God's loving embrace - maybe even Satan and his minions. Wikipedia has a useful discussion of the issue.

It's enough to send traditional, humorless, bile-driven Calvinists into a frenzy, though a few obscurantist fringe thinkers of that ilk (like Barth) seemed to have taken it seriously.

The Armstrong-era WCG also toyed with the idea.

Don't get me wrong... I quite like the idea of universal reconciliation. If you're going to proclaim a gospel of grace, and don't want to transform God into a double-predestination monster, then it makes a good deal of sense. Any aggravation it causes fundamentalists is an added bonus!

But, when did it gravitate to the heart of WCG dogma: "a key aspect of WCG's Christ-centered, Trinitarian Theology"?

Or has Ted got it all wrong?

What might Joe Tkach's buddies in the NAE make of this? After all, as the Wiki article states: Evangelicals and related Christian denominations have published extensively against universalism in recent decades, defending the doctrine of perpetual Hell.

Clarification please!

Meeker's Apology

This is the apology Joel Meeker posted on the UCG Elders' Forum. Wouldn't it be interesting to know if he sent a private apology to Aaron Dean?

From Joel Meeker, Milford OH

I must apologize for my EF post of Wednesday last week. In my message I put the reputation of the organization before the honor of God, when I know that God owns the world and "those who dwell therein" as David said in Psalm 24. I allowed my feelings and communication to be harsh, when in reality I do have confidence that He will “complete a good work” in us as Paul said to the Philippians. His honor is always more important than our organizational concerns of the moment, and I trust He will accomplish what we cannot seem to do ourselves.

I want to apologize to the elders who submitted their ballots in all honesty, knowing that I don't have insight into the prayer, fasting, and sincerity with which you fulfilled your privilege at the GCE.

I want to apologize for posting a negative judgment of "another man's servant." I am reminded in the cool of the day that God tells us not to do so. He reserves the right to judge His servants according to His perfect justice and in His time.

As apologies go I suppose it does the job, but it's hardly fulsome is it? In fact, it almost seems to be what in this neck of the woods (Australia/New Zealand) might even be termed a "Clayton's" apology. It's certainly extremely "preachy."

Special thanks to the sender.

For the Record

I've learned that Joel Meeker has issued an apology to the Elders' Forum for his ill-tempered posting attacking Aaron Dean and the General Council of Elders. The person sending the information notes that reporting this would be "a fair follow-up."

Agreed. Anyone got a copy that they can forward on?

Five Blogs I've Never Read and Never Will

It's one of those 'tag' games that race through the blogging community like influenza. It started with the rather precious challenge to list five blogs that make you think. Dr. Jim West, the biblioblogging Baptist bulldog, pulled it inside-out and relaunched it as five blogs to never read, and having tagged the Most Reverend Dr. N. T. Wrong, the good bishop then saw fit to pass his blessing on.

The task is a difficult one given the wording. Obviously I have seen (if not read in any depth) each of the monstrosities listed below, otherwise how else to know the deep things of Shaitan? In any case, it's a 60/40 split between non-COG and COG contenders --- interestingly Bishop Wrong chose to list one of David Ben-Ariel's on his list of horrors, a deserving choice. Anyway, here's mine.

1. The Watchmen: Christian and Patriotic Views from Ulster. I somehow don't think this fellow means patriotism in the Beatles sense of "Give Ireland back to the Irish," and I doubt he's a Guinness drinker either. And who the heck is this Spurgeon guy?

2. The Blog of Concord. Bad art and obscure monologues currently featuring the Smalcald Articles, ick!

3. A Painting that Preaches Christ. The spurting blood, the devilish misuse of Bach, the sheer unrelieved kitsch of it all... liebe Gott!

4. Against the Hirelings. Tom Mahon's blog... (no sign of a promised portrait.)

5. The Surprising God. Largely the work of the not-so-surprising Ted Johnston.

So, now to pass on the meme: Gary Scott and Felix Taylor, both of whom have fine, thoughtful blogs, consider yourselves tagged ;-)